Justin Foell

Chris Rock, as the illustrious SNL character “Nat X,” once hilariously shamed The Man for his assignment of February as Black History Month:

I just want to say that February is Black History Month. Isn’t that nice? The Man gives us February because it’s the shortest month of the year! Now, I’m not complaining, but I think we deserve at least a thirty-day month.

But instead of looking for a better, longer black history month, let’s instead normalize the months. Introducing the Stevadorian Calendar!

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Forced upgrades and planned obsolescence – almost all companies do it, but Apple has really advanced it from a science to an art form. I was holding onto iOS5 with my cold, Minnesota frost-bitten hands because I liked Google Maps as the default mapping app – you know, one that will actually deliver correct directions. But there were a couple of apps I wanted to install that required iOS6. Too bad I waited too long, once iOS7 was released, upgrading to iOS6 was no longer possible. At one point, iOS6 users were automatically upgraded to iOS7 “over the air” – meaning it happened automatically without user approval or intervention. Then there was a lawsuit which quickly stopped OTA updates. None-the-less, iOS6 is a memory, and while I thought I would only have to deal with Apple Maps and iOS7 generally grinding my “old” iPhone to a halt, it turns out there are many more bugs to be discovered.

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iOS7 is full of several major changes. I can handle the UI overhaul in iOS7. My dad says it looks like all the icons were redrawn by a kindergartener, but I’ll quickly get over that part. What I can’t handle is when there are serious issues with the functionality of the software. Despite knowing all of this, I still clicked that update button, and it seemed to go swimmingly.

Post Upgrade Calendar Blues

As soon as I upgraded iOS, I had like 27 apps that also wanted to upgrade. When I started the iOS upgrade process I had at least a gigabyte of free space on my phone, so I figured everything was kosher. The iOS update went fine, but when I tried updating my apps, I was informed that I had no free space left to work with. When I went to the usage screen, I was surprised to see “Calendars & Reminders” at the top of the list with 1.8GB. Normally it’s either photos or music (understandably), so WTF was going on?

I did some searching and was glad and annoyed that I wasn’t alone. I was glad since others were having the same problem, there was likely a known cause, and hopefully a solution. This guy with a 64GB iPhone had his calendar usage balloon up to 25GB! This other guy made a graph of his usage over time.

I was annoyed because I feel that if Steve Jobs were still around, he would have found the developers responsible for the terrible iOS7 calendar and said to them “One more thing… you’re fired!” He would have then put his best guys in there to fix the bug. But here I was 4 point releases into iOS7 and clearly this remains an issue.

The Problem

It seems iOS7 was copying all of my subscribed calendars to the phone. And since several of them have recurring events with no end date, it just kept copying them ad infinitum. I deleted some photos and some music and the calendar storage usage just went up to 2GB. So I deleted some more photos and some more music. I tried a couple of suggestions (see below), but before anything could take effect, it just kept ballooning up.

The Solution?

So I tried going into Settings -> Mail, Contacts, Calendars -> Subscribed Calendars and setting them all to “inactive” by toggling off each calendar’s “Account” switch. Strangely the usage size did not diminish and there were several of the same subscribed calendars still showing up in the calendar app.

I left the subscribed calendars “inactive” and went into the calendar app and tried to delete the very calendars I had marked inactive. In the calendar app, click “Calendars” then click the “i” icon next to a subscribed calendar, scroll to the bottom then choose “Delete Calendar.” This, in theory, would delete all of the subscribed events that have been (stupidly) copied to the phone.

I don’t know if I was getting impatient or what, but my phone was still hemorrhaging memory. I tried several other things:

Putting the phone into airplane mode so it couldn’t download anymore data (was it downloading or calculating dates until the end of time?)
Going to Settings -> Mail, Contacts, Calendars -> Subscribed Calendars and actually deleting suspected large calendars (re-adding is easy enough)
Closing all apps (including the calendar) and then restarting the phone

I’m not sure which of these straws actually broke the camel’s back, but I suspect I could have skipped the deleting of the subscribed calendars and had a little more patience. If you’re having this issue, I recommend doing the normal “Delete Calendar” from the calendar app just before you go to bed, while your phone is charging. Then in the morning, close the all apps and restart the phone.

Where ever you are now Steve, we could use some of that classic Jobs incessant attention to detail that has been lost.

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A quick Google of “when to have a baby” will turn up tons of articles written for women, by women. From Women’s Day and Parent’s magazine, they offer plenty of recommendations and reassurances to those who have had kids earlier and later in life. So why is there none written for men? Because we don’t need it. Or do we?

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We’re not the ones carrying the baby through gestation. We’re not going to experience the pain of childbirth, the most painful experience a woman will likely endure – unmatched by anything men would willingly experience. We’re also not going to be the ones breastfeeding the baby for another 9 months outside of the womb. I don’t think most guys would be willing to take a 2 year sabbatical from their favorite quaff for any of this.

The truth is, men are never ready to have their first baby, they are only capable of it. Nothing will prepare a man for having a child like childbirth itself.

During my wife’s first pregnancy I did little preparation. My wife had unbelievable nesting urges. She really got into couponing, and building up our pantry “nest.” I was fascinated with the biology of it all, but I never had any urges myself. Truth be told, I probably would have never suggested to my wife that we have kids. I simply waited until her biological clock was ticking so hard that I had no choice. She wore me down, like a “typical” guy in a committed relationship who’s unwilling to propose marriage. Fear of the unknown is probably the best way to describe it.

I didn’t have a hospital bag packed for our firstborn. In my defense, neither did my wife. We blissfully rolled into 9-months of pregnancy as if it weren’t inevitable. Could we just wait until the last minute? Sure, why not. Then we went to the hospital on a false alarm. So when we got home, did we pack bags? Heck no! When we went to Jessi’s next regular doctor appointment they informed her that her water was broken and we needed to go straight to the hospital. We told the doctor that we hadn’t packed bags, so we went home, packed them and then went to the hospital.

Several hours later, I was a father. The biggest bombshell is that now I’m morally and legally responsible for another person’s life. This is the metamorphosis that happens within men upon the birth of their first child – coming to terms with the newfound responsibility. Lack of sleep aside, the time after my son Jules was born was joyous. I never thought that I’d adjust to fatherhood, but it’s like I said, nothing will prepare you until you’re holding him in your arms.

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Mid-December I started to get a tickle in my throat. I knew the score. I only get sick about once a year, and this was going to be it. I took some precautionary measures – homeopathic meds that included vitamin C and zinc. I worked half days. Then it came on strong. With a fever of 102 I decided it was time to visit the doctor to see what I had gotten myself into.

Influenza A – the “bad” flu. Its subtypes include all these terrible sounding viruses: Swine Flu, Bird Flu, and H1N1. The doctor informed me that I was the first recorded case of the season at the clinic. Patient Zero.

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I was supposed to attend a work conference that weekend. My doctor advised me not to travel, but I did anyway. My flight was non-refundable and my mother-in-law would be meeting us because we were bringing the baby. It was the baby’s first airplane trip.

Sitting in my hotel room I realized how stupid it was for me to travel. I’m an active vector for a potentially deadly virus. My largest fear was that my daughter would contract the virus and complications would arise. The doctor had foreseen this, so my infant daughter was on preventative medication. Then there’s my mother-in-law who would return to take care of her mother who has cancer. What if the virus spread? Infants and the elderly are the most vulnerable, especially if they have already compromised immune systems.

Shame. Guilt. NyQuil.

Viruses & Computer Viruses – strikingly similar

Most of the day in the hotel was spent reading Wikipedia about influenza and viruses in general. Viruses are terrifying. They aren’t really living things, described as “organisms at the edge of life”. They’re just microscopic particles of genetic code, waiting to use your body to perpetuate itself.

They have quite a bit in common with computer viruses. By itself, the virus can’t do anything. You usually have to do something stupid to contract a virus: re-using needles, unprotected sex, blindly running executable files from the internet. Then it spreads by seemingly harmless activity: touching, sneezing, connecting to the internet.

The virus needs you to do it’s thing. It needs action to be contracted, it needs your cells to reproduce, it needs you to send it out to infect others. It takes over the cells it’s infected, and forces them to instead make more viruses. Your cells will keep making copies of the virus until it bursts open like a spider egg coming apart at the seams. The reason we get a cough, runny nose, and sore throat is because we breathed in the virus. It started attacking cells in our sinuses, then dripped down into our throat. Gross.

Does the flu vaccine work?

I’ll admit it, I was a skeptic of the flu vaccine. When I was a kid, I got one shot for the Measles and then I was set for life. Why do I have to get a flu vaccine every year? Obviously science isn’t working or it’s some sort of scam. Or is it?

Turns out that these little virus bastards are reproducing so fast that they’re mutating into new strains, which may be immune to the current vaccination. The World Health Organization has to constantly play a cat-and-mouse game to predict what strains are likely to outbreak in next year’s season so they can be included in the vaccine. When you get a shot, it’s not just for one strain, but 3 or 4 strains that include both Influenza A and B.

Even if they don’t predict spot-on, there’s a chance that your body will have produced some anti-bodies that are close enough to effectively fight whatever strain you come into contact with. So do yourself (and your family) a favor. Get a flu shot. I know I will be.

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Remember how I said I wouldn’t buy a Chariot bike trailer because they were too expensive? I take it back. Well, sort of. My friend who owns one recently got his 2nd child riding solo so I took the opportunity to purchase his in excellent used condition at half the cost.

My friend is right, Chariots are finely built. Even though Chariot was recently purchased by Thule, I believe they are still made in Canada. This probably contributes to both the high cost and quality of construction. If you have some extra disposable income, I highly recommend buying one. If you don’t, find one second hand, you won’t be disappointed.

Affixing the Chariot to my wife’s bike with quick-release skewer on the back wheel was easy. Adding it to my single speed was going to take some research.

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Technology, Bicycling, Hobbies, Kids, Life.

Stevadorian Calendar

Steveadorian?

By the numbers

Month (re)names

iOS7 Calendar Storage Space

Post Upgrade Calendar Blues

The Problem

The Solution?

When are you ready to have a baby? – Men’s edition

Get a flu shot

Viruses & Computer Viruses – strikingly similar

Does the flu vaccine work?

Chariot trailer on a single speed

Axle

Adapter